Choosing Love: Moving from Ego to Essence in Relationships
“When we relate from Essence, the dominant feeling is acceptance: You allow others to be the way they are. In fact, you celebrate how they are. This doesn’t mean you might not dislike something about them, but the general feeling toward them is that everything is just right as it is.” Gina Lake
For all of us who are seeking to experience more nourishing, fruitful and fulfilling relationships, this book is a must read. While its emphasis is on romantic relationships, the guidance and teaching can be applied to all types of relationships.
The one lesson that stood out for me from the book, is to always choose love over personal preferences.
The dictionary definition of a preference is, a greater liking for one alternative over another or others. We all have preferences that are unique to us. It's a naturally occurring inclination we develop overtime as we relate to our environment.
These preferences usually shape the way we see and interact with the world. Relationships provide a one of a kind opportunity for a melting pot of individual preferences. However, we often miss this golden opportunity in our relationships to learn and grow from each other, as we allow what we like and prefer to dominate our interactions with our loved ones.
Gina's guidance however, helps us to identify this un-serving, egoic pattern, which usually leads to conflict and pain. But instead shows us how to choose true love in every moment. The type of love that is not fear based but unconditional, accepting, forgiving, considerate and inclusive.
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